Got this from my dad:

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: “Also, yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed.” “OH NO!” the president exclaims. “That’s terrible!” His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, head in hands. Finally, the president looks up and asks, “How many is a brazillion?

Just got done with my metal “exam” — it took almost 5 hours and out of all the possibilities, I drew sweat soldering. At first I was like okay, cool, doesn’t sound too bad ’cause my sweat soldering exercise went perfectly the first time. But no … after like 4 attempts of heating and repositioning solder and pickling and scrubbing and filing/sanding the metal, it didn’t want to look halfway decent So I gave up and figured a B was good enough … and the 0.8 points left between that and a B+ can bite me. I’m sick of metal and it can die for all I care.

I’m bored and frustrated about my small veins. Attempted to donate plasma today but couldn’t … it’s been five years since I last tried with blood and figured they might have gotten at least a little bigger, but no. Nothing happened when they tied that plastic strap around my upper arm and told me to clench my fist. Two nurses felt both my arms and got nada — why the fuck can’t my veins be normal? At least they gave me a squeeze ball and said to come back in a month. I wonder if it’ll make any difference. Anyway, I decided to do a survey (from Shaune) to stop thinking about it:

Your birth date: July 5, 1984

Your age: 21

Age you wish you were: I don’t know, there’s always something new each year.

Your height: 5’8″

The color of your eyes: Green.

Happy with it: Yeah.

The color of your hair: Brown with darker ends.

Happy with it: At the moment.

Left/right/ambidextrous: Left, though I’m ambidextrous when painting.

Your living arrangement: Roommates at school, my dad at home.

Have any pets: Kitties! Midnight & Mackie at home, Chloe, Jezabelle, and Mosley at school.

What’s your job: Student.

Piercings: None.

Tattoos: None.

Addictions: Hanson, internet, being organized.

Do you speak another language: Not really … can understand/read a bit of Spanish (after 4 years of classes), but can’t speak it to save my life.

Have a favorite quote: It changes.

Deep thoughts about life and you in it …

Do you live in the moment: Sometimes.

Do you consider yourself tolerant of others: Yeah, unless they give me a reason not to.

Do you have any secrets: A few.

Do you hate yourself: It depends on my mood.

Do you like your handwriting: It’s alright.

Do you have any bad habits: Yep … picking at my nails is one.

What is the compliment you get most from people: That I’m too nice or too quiet.

If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called: Don’t know, don’t care.

What’s your biggest fear: Spiders, early death, living alone.

Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool: Uh no.

Are you a loner: Sometimes.

What are your number one priorities in life: Getting through school, earning money, having a semi-decent job, settling down a year or two after college if I’m lucky.

If you were another person, would you be friends with you: Depends on the personality, etc. of the other person.

Are you a daredevil: Yep. If you can go skydiving (and bungee jumping, jet skiing, parasailing, rollercoaster-ing, etc.), there’s no question.

Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself: I get depressed easily and can take things the wrong way … I guess a fear could be the assumption that if you don’t make something of yourself in life, you’re a failure.

Do you think you are emotionally strong: At times.

Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life: Screwing up at Yorktown sucked, but then again, everything happens for a reason, right?

The most important lesson you’ve learned from life: Just keep swimming.

What do you like the most about your body: That I’m tall.

Do you think you are good looking: Sometimes.

Are you confident: I try to be, but it doesn’t always happen.

Do people know how you feel: Depends on who they are.

Are you perceived wrongly: Those who don’t know me just think I’m a nice, quiet girl who keeps to herself. If they gave me a chance, they’d find out they’re very wrong.

Do you …

Smoke: No.

Do drugs: No.

Read the newspaper: I read The Breeze (JMU newspaper) twice a week.

Pray: No.

Do you go to church: Not unless I have to (like on Easter and Christmas).

Talk to strangers who IM you: Yeah … have to find out where they got my screenname!

Sleep with stuffed animals: No ’cause they always fell off my bed.

Take walks in the rain: If I forget/don’t have my umbrella.

Talk to people even though you hate them: Only if I have to.

Have you ever …

Liked your voice: It’s okay.

Hurt yourself: I guess.

Been out of the country: Yeah, Australia was frickin’ awesome.

Eaten something that made other people sick: Don’t think so.

Been unfaithful: Yeah …

Been in love: Am right now.

Had a medical emergency: When I was really little.

Had a surgery: Nope.

Ran away from home: No.

Played strip poker: Don’t know how to play poker lol.

Gotten beaten up: No.

Beaten someone up: No.

Been picked on: Who hasn’t?

Been on stage: Unfortunately.

Slept outdoors: Yeah … love camping/hiking, haven’t been in forever.

Pulled an all-nighter: Yeah … and oh what fun nights they were.

Gone one day without food: No.

Talked on the phone all night: My phone wouldn’t last all night.

Slept all day: A few times.

Made out with a stranger: Yeah …

Had sex with a stranger: That’s where I draw the line.

Kissed the same sex: Yep.

Been betrayed: Kind of.

Broken the law: Yeah, like everyone else.

Have you ever killed an animal by accident: No, and I hope I never do … I saw a dead dog (hit by a car) in the gutter on my way to class this morning … it was sad.

On purpose: No.

Told a secret you swore you wouldn’t tell: No.

Stolen anything: Little things.

Been on radio/TV: I’ve been mentioned on my college radio by my ex-roommate who’s a DJ. I was like yay.

Had a nervous breakdown: Maybe.

Clothes and other fashion …

Current shoe brand: New Balance.

Cologne/perfume: None.

Wear hats: Hats suck.

Judge other people by their clothing: A little bit. Like if they’re wearing all pink and have a Vera Bradley bag over one shoulder, I probably won’t talk to them (sorry).

Wear makeup: For special occasions.

Favorite article of clothing: Sweatshirts ’cause they keep me warm.

Are you trendy: Maybe … I have my own style.

Would you rather wear a uniform to school: Um no … had enough of that at Foxcroft.

Friends …

Do you have any gay/lesbian friends: Yep.

Who is your best friend: Brian.

Who’s the one person that knows most about you: Brian.

What’s the best advice that anyone has ever given to you: “Do the right thing.” –my dad (lol)

Do you remember your first love: Yeah, though I don’t want to remember.

Do you consider love a mistake: No — you’re supposed to learn from your mistakes.

What do you find romantic: When someone goes out of their way for you or does little things that make you smile.

Turn-ons …

Turn-on: I like guys who are tall, have a “dark” personality, are computer literate, can appreciate art/design, and are open-minded.

Turn-off: Guys who are obsessed with sports (the screaming-at-the-TV type), short, have no car, only want you for your looks, and drink/party every chance they get.

Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive: I guess?

What is best about the opposite sex: How they take care of you.

What is worst about the opposite sex: How they go back on their word.

Do you read porn: No.

What’s the last present someone gave you: Brian’s mom gave me a Pez cow … ’cause I like cows and they go moo.

What do you dislike most: Annoying people.

Who was the last person …

You wanted to kill: *shrugs*

That you laughed at: My metal professor.

That laughed at you: Maybe Denise.

That turned you on: No comment.

You went shopping with: Myself.

That broke your heart: Brad/Brian.

To disappoint you: Doron … if it really was him who IMed me earlier.

To ask you out: Brian.

To make you cry: Brian.

To brighten up your day: My methodology prfessor … he’s so funny.

That you thought about: Starza ’cause I just read her away message.

You talked to on the phone: Brian.

You talked to in person: Starza.

When was the last time you …

Smiled: When I thanked the nurse at BioLife.

Laughed: Metal class.

Cried: A few weeks ago.

Danced: Long time ago.

Were sarcastic: Don’t remember.

Kissed someone: Sunday night.

Had a nightmare: Don’t remember.

Talked on the phone: Monday.

Listened to the radio: Today.

Watched TV: Yesterday.

Went out: Define “out.”

Were mean: Don’t know.

Sang: Don’t remember.

Saw a movie: Corpse Bride on Sunday.

Said “I love you:” To Brian earlier today.

Missed someone: Right now.

Fought with a family member: Not for a long time.

Had a serious conversation: Over the weekend.

Got drunk: Umm … when I turned 21?

Okay that was longer than I thought … now it’s time to shower and have dinner and watch Friends and Top Model and convince myself to do homework even though all I wanna do is curl up in a blanket with a cup of tea and forget about everything.

I found this on another Hanson fan’s site and just started laughing ’cause it’s so true!

Being a Hanson fan is like being made queen when your country is on the verge of a revolution.

Being a Hanson fan is like being owned by someone who doesn’t know they own you and doesn’t know they can break your heart in an instant.

Being a Hanson fan is like having a blood type that no one else but another fan has (so if you need a blood transfusion you better run to LJ lol).

Being a Hanson fan is like having a tumor on your heart. If they remove it, you’re nothing, if it stays your ups are your downs and your downs are your ups.

Being a Hanson fan is like being a puppet for some child. They control almost all of your moves, yet they don’t even know it.

Being a Hanson fan is like waking up inside a dream over and over again.

Being a Hanson fan is like taking ecstasy and sucking your big toe. You wake up going “WTF?”

Being a Hanson fan is like being schizophrenic. You hear voices and see things. Strange things … very strange things … aka Taylor.

Being a Hanson fan suddenly makes you think you are artistic. Because you start making bags, clothes, etc. When they really suck.

Being a Hanson fan is like being in a cult. You all have secret codes and wear weird things (all bought from the Hanson.net store or made in the above fashion).

Being a Hanson fan makes you lose sleep because you upload random poo for other fans so you feel elitist.

Being a Hanson fan makes everyone else in the world stay (at a minimum) five feet from you at all times.

Being a Hanson fan means you are usually on at least THREE different prescription drugs so you aren’t depressed when they are on tour in a country that isn’t yours.

Being a Hanson fan means every time you see broccoli you think of Isaac.

Being a Hanson fan means you will spend 84585744599 dollars on random crap on eBay.

Being a Hanson fan means going broke just to buy your third copy of whatever CD is *finally* out.

Being a Hanson fan means you are probably used to drag queens, even if subconsciously.

Being a Hanson fan means never having to speak in actual English complete sentences or make any sense. You can just put a headphones in your profile and everyone KNOWS.

Being a Hanson fan means getting a speeding ticket every time you play “Penny & Me” in your car.

Being a Hanson fan means you understand what TTMON, RTA, LFA, MON, TTA, UAL, etc. mean in a heartbeat.

Being a Hanson fan means you probably laugh to yourself an awful lot. Especially when people accidentally say a line from one of the songs.

Being a Hanson fan means you have a keyboard, guitar, or drumset that has collected dust over the last 8 years.

Being a Hanson fan means when having sex and not having an orgasm, it’s okay, but going to a concert and not getting a meet and greet is DISASTROUS.

Being a Hanson fan means never explaining yourself to anyone unless it is worth it.

Being a Hanson fans means admitting to the fact that you have always dreamed of going to Tulsa, Oklahoma. Think about that folks. TULSA, OKLAHOMA.

Being a Hanson fan means smoking djarums and getting sexy lung cancer because Tay makes it look so cool, man!

Being a Hanson fan hones your storytelling abilities (“Ezra is REALLY Ike’s child and it’s all just a coverup!”).

Being a Hanson fan means you need two iPods, obviously.

Being a Hanson fan means you feel slightly nostalgic eating chunky peanut butter, red jelly beans, or Twinkies. Still.

Being a Hanson fan means you know the dream will never die.

Being a Hanson fan means never believing anyone when they say “soon” because I mean let’s all remember 2000 – 2004 folks.

Being a Hanson fan means beating girls up to get to the barricade. WHOOP WHOOP!

Being a Hanson fan means spending the time you should be sleeping trying to find a damn full studio version of “Go.” GRR.

Being a Hanson fan means breaking out in song randomly and having no one else know what the heck you are singing.

Being a Hanson fan means we all secretly hate each other and would stab each other in the back instantly if it involved the boys. Either that or we secretly want to marry each other because “Hanson fans are the only ones who understand my inner turmoil!” Sad but true.

Being a Hanson fan means you’d sell a kidney to get an original copy of MMMBop or Boomerang.

Being a Hanson fan means spending your time (and forty bucks) on a forum where the subject matters are:
“I got my period today!”
“Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman”
“BSB OMGNASLNFDHBDSFBDSF”
“My dog is my soul mate”

Grr, JMU mail is down … just when I emailed people yesterday about my anthropology paper and need to check it. Blah … but oh well. I got my New Student Record, so gonna go see if I know anybody, then head to Taylor for coffee, newspaper, GCOM, and lunch … so bye bye.

But the Daily Double first:

1. What is the most used program on your computer?
Umm … probably AIM, IE, Notepad, WS_FTP, Windows Media Player, Photoshop, and Word … yeah I know that’s more than one, sue me

2. What is your favorite animal and why?
Horses … seahorses … the weird dragon leafy fish things … cows … moo! I dunno, just ’cause they’re cool and they can go moo. And snuffies!

Well, today is the official start of cold weather … it’s like 36! If it’s gonna be cold, it needs to snow, and if not, then be warm, you know? Haha. ‘Cause I have riding later today, and I hate riding when it’s freezing outside … but oh well. Oh yeah, a Goucher representative is coming today, so I’m going to that. I have Spanish next, and then double English after break. Fun. And then riding … I just hope I don’t get sick or anything, ’cause that’s the last thing I need. Ah well, what can you do. By the way, about Sunday in the previous post — Brian and I went dress shopping again at Tysons, and this time we actually found 2 that I liked — but of course they were over $100, but luckily my dad said I could get one if I paid for the amount over $100 (like $60). So after much contemplating about which one I should get (’cause they were both awesome), I decided on this red/burgundy one — it’s in two pieces, is full-length, strapless, and has 2 ties down the front of the top. It’s cool. Now they just have to not cancel semi-formal (’cause of the shootings and other schools) … so yeah. But even if it is, this weekend will rock anyway! Okay, well I g2g now and do some stuff … so bye! Oh yeah, and this is a cute forward I got:

Since a very long time ago, people have searched for the meaning of love. But even the great philosophers, with their profound definitions, could not fully touch its true essence. In a survey of 4 – 8 year olds, kids share their views on love. But what do little kids know about love? Read on and be surprised that despite their young and innocent minds, kids already have a simple but deep grasp of that four-letter word:

“Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.”

“Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your french fries without making them give you any of theirs.”

“Love is when someone hurts you. And you get so mad but you don’t yell at him because you know it would hurt his feelings.”

“Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is okay.”

“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.”

“Love is if you hold hands and sit beside each other in the cafeteria. That means you’re in love. Otherwise, you can sit across from each other and be okay.”

“Love is when mommy sees daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redbird.”

“I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.”

“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.”

“You can break love, but it won’t die.”

Woah x 3. LOL. Well, things are definitely okay with Brad now! Look at what he wrote in this survey I sent him:

8. What are your plans for the weekend?
Well, saturday claire and i are gonna hang out … maybe go see a movie or get dinner

13. Are you in love with anyone now and they have no idea?
In love, and they know it

28. Perfect wedding song?
“And nothing else matters” by Mettalica

29. Do you have a boy/girl friend?
Yeap!

30. A crush?
Only my G/f

53. If you were going to have sex with anyone, right now, who would it be?
Definately Claire. I’m totally in love with her (<3 babe)

So yeah. I think my fears of him not loving me and stuff have been quieted for awhile. The last question, even though he added it in, made me go aww, hehe. But guess what he suggested for Saturday when we spend practically the whole day with each other? That we take a shower together. At first I was like um woah … but after thinking about it for awhile, it doesn’t seem that bad. I mean, it’s not like he hasn’t seen me like that … and he’s doing it ’cause he loves me … so it’s okay. And he knows that I’m kinda nervous about it ’cause I haven’t done it before, so hopefully it’ll go pretty slow. I’ll let you know what happens.

Oh, and guess what? My plates came yesterday! I’m so putting them on tomorrow night when I get home, hehe. Plus, Dad said that something from poetry.com (where I submitted a poem) came in the mail with a window showing my poem. He said it was really good, but I dunno why it came and why they sent it. Guess I’ll find out tomorrow night too! Know what else is cool? I finished my English paper last night — a whole day before it’s due. Go me! Haha. I gotta work on that happening for more assignments.

I got to see Da Vinci’s Notebook tonight! It was so awesome, Shaune even said that it was their best concert yet that she’s seen, and I definitely agree, hehe. They played like 3 new songs, which of course were great, and then afterwards we got coffee and drove around for awhile (I got to try out Biblio!), and then we headed home So yeah, tonight was actually fun for once. And know what’s crazy? I might get to see Brad tomorrow, after like 2 weeks of not. Watch it not happen (again), but *sigh* … at least I’ll have Neil to cheer me up if I don’t. And speaking of Neil, it’s crazy, like he loves me now. As in the way that Brad does (or did). I’m just like woah. I mean, it’s really sweet and cute, and he’s a really nice guy, but sometimes it’s like, okay, don’t like me that much yet. And wow, Shaune sent me this really good essay thing about relationships:

It is reasonable to say that the teenage years are simply confusing times. I myself am thoroughly mystified by a variety of people, actions, places, or situations ranging from physics to learning the waltz. I am horribly confused, though, as to why many adolescent girls find it necessary to endure gratuitous mistreatment from their relationships. During extensive phone conversations and slumber parties, I have listened to many depressing stories pertaining to my friends’ “dating bliss.” It seems that the girls’ significant others have proven themselves to be unworthy of my friends’ affection, much less that of anyone else. Pals of mine have been cheated on repeatedly, ignored, stood up, belittled, and insulted by their boyfriends. If that is not enough, the “gentlemen” have accepted extraordinary gifts from my friends such as stereos, video games and taxi rides while they are unable to return the favor with something as small as a date.

It is certain that a predominant cause to these girls’ gluttony for punishment is the absence of their self-esteems. Being strikingly smart, talented, and attractive, it seems absurd how my friends have the notion that they cannot go out with anyone better than those who they are already dating. Perhaps they believe it is their duty to spoil their boyfriends in order to keep them by means of paying for dinner and movie tickets, driving to their houses for visits, and buying presents for them on random occasions. These girls, however, are the ones who deserve to be taken on dates, presented with gifts, and treated properly. It is evident that someone must be satisfied with whom she is in order to be able to deal with the challenges and personal needs in a relationship.

It is likely that many hopeless relationships continue to endure due to one party’s fear of being alone. Many people would rather have a significant other than be alone, believing a blatant myth stating “single” translates to “unhappy.” Societal pressures from the media urge teenagers to be with someone in order to be cool. What is “cool,” anyhow? What’s more, does life exist outside of the glamorized “boy meets girl” fantasy? Perhaps society is unacquainted with good times spent on the dance floor of a club or in the flashing lights of a cosmic bowling alley. Quite a few girls seem to be unaware of the experiences involving the absence of a boyfriend, not comprehending the benefits involved. A girl cannot enjoy a relationship if she is unable to enjoy life being single, first.

Furthermore, my friends seem to have trapped themselves in poor relationships by an irrational fear of change. Staying with the same miserly and selfish boyfriends for months on end, they have grown used to their partners’ disparaging comments and disrespect. Statements on the lines of “You’re fat,” or “You’re stupid” become acceptable in the girls’ eyes, soon to be regarded upon as the truth. It baffles me how people become so tolerant, listening to the rude abusive remarks from boyfriends who claim to love them. These relationships appear to be pointless and unhealthy, lacking any mutual love or respect of any kind. High school is the time to meet different people and enjoy life while growing as a person at the same time. Relationships are not meant to be barriers of personal growth and self-discovery, nor hinder one from enjoying herself.

It will never cease to baffle me why so many of my friends tear themselves apart on the inside by enduring harmful, worthless relationships. It is logical to believe that if one is unable to love and respect herself, she will consequently be unable to receive respect from any significant other. Perhaps after discovering this knowledge, my friends will “wear the pants” in their relationships, earning themselves the respect and love they deserve. If not, change is the best option, allowing the girls to grow and learn from their experiences. Hopefully, people I know will eventually stop confusing me by refraining from selling themselves short.